today love smiled on me

such an odd person.

i remember thinking that when i first saw you.

but that's like the pot calling the kettle black.

hello, kettle.

hello, pot.

i called you super ninja.

you were always running around

jumping over things, posing.

everything you picked up

became a nunchuk.

you were quiet but i could

tell you were always thinking.

still waters do run deep.

you wanted to major in philosophy.

i loved that.

you always tried.

no matter what was placed

upon your shoulders.

you never gave up.

i admired that.

you were stronger than

so many other people

i know.

you always had a smile

and something nice to say.

i honestly can't remember

you making a mean comment.

that says a lot about you.

you were a genuinely nice person.

i never told you i appreciated that.

you are what people should aim to be.

despite your hardships you never stopped.

if only your body had not stopped on you.

i'm glad to have known you.

i don't like goodbyes.

sadly all things must pass...

i wish you nothing but the best in your next life,

dennis.

take me out tonight because i want to see people and i want to see life

ahhh, the sweet sound of the smiths's 'there is a light that never goes out'. that song has been stuck in my head for days. i fell in love with the melancholy band years ago during a trip to busch gardens williamsburg. during the hour ride, my sister and friends took turns playing favorite songs.

i'm sure i popped in something by the police or madonna. i thought madonna was hot shit. she could do no wrong...at least up until the fake british accent. well, i like 'hung up' but that's about it for the newer stuff. anyway, when caroline's turn came 'round, she popped in (i keep saying 'popped in'. it's because back in the olden days--haha--we had cassette players) 'strangeways, here we come'. i immediately connected to the first song, 'a rush and a pull and the land is ours'. it was just such an odd sound, i don't know how to describe it...it was just different.

thanks to my sister and caroline, i was exposed to alternative bands like depeche mode, r.e.m., the red hot chili peppers and the cure. without their influence i'm positive i would have continued to subject myself only to the magical tunes of paula abdul, the bangles and, of course, the police and madonna (or whatever was being played on Z104. i am embarrassed to admit that i owned both milli vanilli's and martika's cassettes. the horror!). not that there's anything wrong with the bangles, the police and madonna (yes, there IS something wrong with paula :P), but broadening musical tastes is something big sisters/brothers are for and, well, i needed to discover something other than safe pop music...and yes, caroline had older siblings--7 of them!

anyway, every time i start singing 'there is a light...' i immediately think of the scene in '500 days of summer' in which zooey deschanel's character sings a few lines to joseph gordon levitt in an elevator. and i don't want that. first of all, the movie is slow, boring and overly appreciated by people who are offended when you call indie films 'movies' (as if the word 'film' makes the POS snore-fests high art. whatever. don't get me wrong, i adore independent movies. they are one of the reasons i belong to netflix. i just hate the superior attitude that some people have because they watch films instead of movies). second of all, is it really fucking necessary for zooey deschanel to sing in every goddamn movie she's in?!

seriously, all of the movies i've seen her in has her prancing about singing in at least one scene. zooey, we get it. you like to sing. you have a band. i think she's cute and i love her bangs, but the singing in movies has got to stop. and i like musicals! i just don't appreciate watching the first eight hours of 'the assassination of jesse james by the coward robert ford' only to finally manage to get to the final minutes and there's zooey in all her singing glory. it kind of ruined the dramatic pacing for me. i wanted to slap her. actually, i want to slap her every time she sings in a movie. i guess i'll just have to settle for rolling my eyes and writing about it on my blog.